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The Blog from Oi Polloi presents:

Seeing as we’ve finally worked out how to have comments working on our new blog, we thought we’d run one of our world-famous caption competitions.

The prize? A pair of Clarks of your choice* from our virtual shoe rack, and a pair of tickets to a massive exhibition of 'wacky shoes' that's currently on at the Victoria and Albert Museum in London courtesy of Clarks themselves. Two runners up will get a pair of tickets too.

Just come up with a witty and whimsical caption for that delightful photograph above and write it in the comments bit below… and make sure you get your caption in by Wednesday the 8th of July otherwise we’ll pretend we haven’t seen it.

*not those dead fancy Made in England Desert Boots though, we're not daft.


This competition is now closed. After much deliberation we are pleased to announce that Nick Wilkins took home the big win with his punishing use of puns... “Putt the tee on I’m driving home, will be back at Fore!”

Runners up prizes go to Matthieu Fabre - “Regrets only,” and Con Little - “You boys still knock out some beautiful clothes, and I love the dry humour on your website.” Yep, a little bit of shameless brown-nosing goes a long way.

Commiserations to all you losers, please try harder next time. 

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The people say...

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  • Janet Palmer

    Colin had always been a bad ass and decided to prove his point by golfing off road!

  • Dave Jones

    “Where’s the pussy?”

  • Clarky

    I know I’m a day late but I was waiting to out funny everyone. No need, all the comments were shite I should win. Laterrrrz

  • Gregory

    Walter White’s mew disguise was working well, but he just couldn’t leave the Wallabies behind.

  • Danny France

    Scratch Golfer

  • Nick Wilkins

    “Putt the tee on I’m driving home, will be back at Fore!”

  • Pete

    Testing his new Clarks out on the green was the only time he didn’t want to hear the words “there’s a hole in one.”

  • Niels Skov

    I was never really Clark Kent…

  • ant owen

    man in clarks
    parks golf cart
    and remarks
    oi polloi boys
    got cool rides
    slick threads
    an kicks that are simply

  • Julian Pattison

    I only went out for a pint o’ milk

  • JOrdan EVans-viney

    If Brenda doesn’t hurry up I’m gonna miss out on they new Reeboks…….I’ve probably missed those padmore and Barnes that were in the sale and all.

  • BIg Al

    Retired Banana Split Bungle……loving his Clarks

  • sim simma

    The little cart was well chuffed with his new rug wig and in its best KIT voice whispered sweet nothings to clarence who without his meds had gone on another knight Rider mission

  • Goosyphus

    I’m an educated fool wit money on my mind
    Got my dick in my hand and a gleam in my eye
    I’m a Clark’d out gangsta, set trippin banger
    And my homies are down so don’t arouse my anger

  • Christian

    Im sure Oi Polloi is round here!?

  • Joe

    (To the tune of Gravel Pit – The Wu Tang Clan)
    He’s, just arrived from the land of the lost,
    Behold the old horse, and golf course,
    Follow thee, the old g’s gotta be,
    Cool as ice in his Clarks Wallabees

  • Noah Grantham

    2 gears, 1 cart.

  • David L

    When ur whip game on fleek #goals

  • Sam Chambers

    I wish I could figure out how to stick it in reverse

  • Matthew

    egg barm please

  • Dan

    Clarks – Finger lickin’ Foot kickin’ good.

  • J Shaw

    Colonel Sanders’ retirement wasn’t going quite as planned, but at least he has his Clarks on to keep him comfortable on those long days on the greens.

  • Con Little

    You boys still knock out some beautiful clothes, and I love the dry humour on your website.

  • Scott Haden

    “The man’s a menace!”

  • Alnesh Parmar

    Keith got a great deal on his new motor

  • Steve Hughes

    Jeremy Clarkson thought he’d found the perfect disguise to get back on Top Gear

  • Robert Belshaw

    This gearstick doesn’t seem to be having any effect

  • Ryan Foley

    Frankly I just don’t get what the pope see’s in these new fangled motor cars

  • John Helzapopin

    Janet! Those coat fellas have put me in their lookbook again

  • CK

    “My grandson went to Oi Polloi and all I got was this lousy pair of Clarks”

  • Rick Howell

    Pope Dave set his stall out for the new era. Comfy shoes and a self drive wagon… Amen to that brothers and sisters.

  • Louise Rodgers

    I think I’m going to need a quicker way to get to the Oi Polloi sale..

  • Rachael Simmons

    It had been a long time since he could sense the presence of a nearby bush…

  • Barry G

    “I’m feeling wood or wedge for Hole 2..”

  • Michael C.

    Launch day for his new smartphone based fashion website for “older clubbers” & Bert unveils his piece de resistance: a nice comfy, geriatric friendly mobile shopping cart.

  • Matt Gregory

    The overwhelming comfort of Anonymous socks stun Eddie Large at recent golf fundraiser.

  • RIck Lees

    Pedal to the metal with the devil on the dash

  • Kyle Wilkins

    System up with the sides down,
    Got the golf course on lockdown,
    My Clarks on in the low ride,
    Hands high when I fly by

  • Chris Conroy

    Today was a good day, didn’t even have to use my AK!

  • Daniel Hulme

    Full speed ahead shoe convention London

  • JON

    Here’s a man driving a golf cart.

  • Matt Walker

    That awful moment when you realise you look like your golf buggy…..

  • Mathew Albiston

    Eccleston’s vision for a veterans F1 season in doubt as Prost complains over handling issues

  • Gareth HIlton

    This golf buggy and myself use the same barber.

  • Neil wingfield

    Ernie’s new glasses made it very difficult to read letters in the correct order. He really loved his Clarks Labweasels nonetheless.

  • Si Gillespie

    After causing a stir at the clubs gala dinner by turning up in his Wallabees Stan thought he should make a discrete exit.

  • Dan Morris

    70 years and all I got was a pair of Clark’s

  • Matthieu Fabre

    Regrets only

  • Phil RAwlinson

    Broke into Clarks and tied all the laces together on the women’s shoes.. Bitches be trippin’.

  • Terry Sweet

    What the f- w’you mean you don’t have one? Eighty thousand dollars for this car and you ain’t got no damn cup holder?

  • Rick Haswell

    Derek simply couldn’t wait to pick up his date for Senior Prom night.

  • Ali Bulloch

    Well, if it’s cool enough for the Beastie Boys and Alice Cooper…

  • Wayne gIlham

    I’ve got the shoes..let’s head to the bunker

  • Paul Marshall

    I will carry my balls in my own bag thank you old chap

  • Paul Marshall

    I will carry my balls in my own bag thank you old chap

  • Bradley Wood

    The one that got away – ‘Opperation Yewtree’

  • Benny Bollinger

    Colonel Sander’s search for new menu items proves futile when no ‘Birdies’ or even ‘Eagles’ make themselves known…

  • Dan Stretton

    They always said that Baz pushed the envelope when it came to golfing fashion

  • Lewis McKenny

    “With a fairway to go, the speed of this thing really is below par!”

  • Gordon Waring

    Oh bugger i forgot my golf clubs.

  • Matt Lloyd

    Jim out on the prowl after installing his new Persian rug on his golf buggy.

  • Matt Walker

    Er, what are you doing with your left hand? Is that why you’ve veered off the road and into a bush?

  • Sam Rowe

    Polo fi tiger – I’m a di golfer, di new Wallabee hotter than sulfur!

  • Ellie

    “This is my spot… yeah, waited for the day they were painting the lines and left it parked up so they couldn’t do this bit. Sound, isn’t it? Wardens can’t nick you when you’re not on double yellows.”

  • Marc Jones

    Breaking Bad season 26 panned by critics and viewers alike.

  • Matt Rawsy

    Barry blamed the soles on his new Clarks for losing control of the golf buggy and ploughing into a tree. Oi Polloi refused to offer a refund for the shoes, and he now has a lifetime ban from Hazel Grove Golf Club.

  • Jon lamb

    I’m definitely leaving negative feedback, the listing said Aston Martin!

  • Ash Morris

    They see me rolling
    They hating, patrolling and trying to catch me riding dirty
    Trying to catch me riding dirty

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