THE MANCHESTER-TO-LONDON SUPER-SPEED DREAMWAY
You spot him from 15 metres away as he strides confidently down the aisle and into first class, phone clutched between his shoulder and ear. He's talking to someone named Tim about an exciting new business venture – flogging vegan Spam to hip new cafes in Soho.
He sits down and plonks his ultra-tough Filson bag on the adjacent seat, immediately ordering a can of Kronenbourg and an espresso from the trolley lady. He drinks them at the same time while loading up the latest Nordic crime drama on his tablet. It's only 11:54am.
“Tim, I gotta go!” he says down the phone. “I'm on the super-speed dreamway to the Big Smoke!”
But despite his potent obnoxiousness, you can't help but admire the guy. He's wearing double corduroy after all.
You spend the rest of your journey hiding in the toilet, contemplating your inadequacies. It's going to be a long ride...
- Le Mont Saint Michel
Corduroy Work Jacket
- Polo Ralph Lauren
Corduroy Baracuda Jacket
Japanese Denim Taper Fit Jeans
Size UK 11