Oi Polloi

No.341

Published: Fri Aug 24 2018

Advice From A Sage Mind

These days, plenty of people are trying to convince you they've got all the answers to life's numerous problems, when in reality, most just tend to spout daft, airy chat, vaguely concealed in faux-psychological jargon.

This gentleman is a rare exception. Every thought that tumbles from his mind and out his gob is a proverbial golden nugget of sage wisdom and superior intellect.

We recently had the pleasure to sit down with this contemporary genius. Here are a few pearls of wisdom that'll hopefully help you make sense of your incomprehensible existence.  

1  “Disregard every flavour Pot Noodle except Bombay Bad Boy. All pail in comparison to its supreme spicy wonderment. If you think otherwise, you have deluded yourself”

2 – “Always wear EG pants with massive pockets. Stuff said pockets with the contents of your tool box. You never know when you're gonna have to fix a sink”

3 – “No matter how tempting, NEVER do jumping jacks under an active helicopter rotor”

4 – “The man who lives by supermarket reductions, dies by supermarket reductions”

5 – “Wear French rugby shirts as often as time permits”

6 – “Exercise extreme caution around geese, swans and other long-necked birds”

7 – “Wear suede chukka boots made in Italy. They're comfortable, and they smell like pasta”

8 – “Ignore advice from sagely know-alls”

  1. Armor-Lux
    Polo ML
    Polo / Orange Henne
    Size L
  2. Champion
    Crewneck T-Shirt
    White
    Size L
  3. Engineered Garments
    Norweigan Pants
    Dark Navy Doublecloth
    Size M
  4. Barleycorn
    Classic 781
    Army Suede
    Size EU 44
  5. Engineered Garments
    Shoulder Pouch
    Dark Navy Cotton Doublecloth