Oi Polloi


Published: Thu Apr 17 2014


Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall,
Humpty Dumpty had a great fall.
All the king’s horses and all the king’s men
Couldn’t put Humpty together again.

Fast forward to the not-so-distant future and Detroit is overrun with salmonella. With the city’s residents feeling particularly queasy, the police force have only one option — source a deceased egg and use the remains to create a hard-shelled cyborg. Utilizing state of the art technology and healthy amount of super-glue, it’s not long before Humpty is back in action and cleaning up the streets like a slice of Warburton’s wiping runny yolk off a plate. His nemesis? Egg-209. His catchphrase? “Boiled or fried, you’re coming with me!”