Oi Polloi


Published: Mon Dec 16 2013

The Road Warrior

You weren’t just someone driving a car on a tarmac road… you were at one with the road, you were the road. Every turn, junction and gear change was handled without thought, without hesitation. Your body knew what it had to do, and it did it, and it did it well. Your competitors weren’t real people with lives, children and wives. They were just barriers that stood between you and your goal, barriers that needed to be broken down. Some were sent swerving off cliff-edges, some went crashing into the sides of highly flammable petrol tankers and some were forced into the sludgy depths of the local tar-pit. None of them set foot in a fuel-powered automobile ever again. With only two wheels left (including your steering wheel), you landed at your destination in a cloud of thick, oily smoke. You were bruised, but unbeaten. Victorious once again — at least until next week. It was a dangerous way to live, but it certainly made the drive to Asda for the big-shop a bit more interesting.