Oi Polloi

No.207

Published: Fri Oct 18 2013

Your wonderful brother

Why couldn’t you have been more like your brother? It can’t be good for your back to be sleeping in that car every night. Why don’t you get a proper job? Microwavable toast will never take off. What happened to that lovely girl you used to go out with? Is that a pattern on your jumper or is it just egg yolk? We’ve changed the wallpaper in your old bedroom. You don’t mind do you? You’d hardly recognize it in there now. So bright. So spacious. The woman at the charity shop was ever so grateful for all those old records and books. There wasn’t anything in there you wanted was there? Your nephews love it in there when they come to stay. They’re just like your brother you know. So clever for their age — and so polite! He’s done such a good job raising them, especially considering how long he’s away in Africa building those schools. Oh, you should have seen how smart he was dressed last time he came for dinner. He’s doing really well for himself you know. Why couldn’t you have just been more like him?